But neither am I “fat.” I would say I’m about 10 to 15 pounds above where I’m most comfortable with my body — which describes the average North American woman. Then, in 2018, many tabloids were also reporting her weight gain, and Rachel reacted – finally, she was 48 at the time and she was also struggling with menopause. When I look at him I see his father. But when it comes to my own relationship? 69 Favourites. About 2 years later, I got my act together and lost all the weight I gained. It feels like if he was trying *at all* he would not eat some of the things he eats. We have a shared gym membership – he has been twice this year – I think he is embarrassed about how he compares with other members. Find out what they had to say about it in these brutal confessions. Next time you’re hanging with a crowd of your peers, look around. 30 Clean-Eating Recipes That The Whole Family Will Enjoy—Even The Kids! Unfortunately, I’m not that wonderful. So, I consider the erectile issues to be related to his unwillingness to take responsibility for his health. Six years later, after two kids and a move to the suburbs, he has gained 50 pounds. I’m well aware of the fact that my inability to tolerate a few extra pounds on an otherwise delightful guy says a lot more about my own shortcomings than about his. (We both work.) My Husband Finds My Weight Gain Sexy. Your husband doesn’t “owe” it to you to stay healthy. I am so happy I found this essay – I thought I was the only one out there, and felt so guilty! He recently started to smoke cigars which I HATE. Barbara: The husband needs to follow the same advice we just gave the wife. He will finish his plate and then start eating some of the food I didn’t eat because I do not want to be overweight. Our youngest son had an intervention with him where he absolutely wept because he felt his Dad was being lazy and choosing to be unhealthy. (This essay first appeared on www.purpleclover.com). Always have and always will. Just ask yourselves how you would feel if your husbands treated you like that – honestly now. Toxoplasmosis In Pregnancy: Symptoms, Treatment And Prevention. But be reasonable. A huge collection of good quality erotic weight gain stories. Then I happened to get in his car and saw wrappers, etc., and realized that my choices did nothing to change him. And also shopping for clothes with him, what joke that is. He dropped a few pounds. (And God knows I’m far from flawless myself.) I try to not make my husband’s weight gain about me, but when I see his careless and horrifically unhealthy food choices, I feel abandoned and angry. For a few months, I had been noticing that he was putting on weight, watching as … I still suggest that he lose weight from time to time, and he assures me that he’s trying. But he always looked like, if necessary, he could shed his glasses and spring into action. When we met, 20 years ago, Mark was just my type. I am 51, but I am 5’8″ and weigh 125-130lbs. Im 53, exercise at least 5 times a week for an hour (cardio and weights ), and eat clean and healthy. For a while, I thought I felt the same about him. He wasn’t in the greatest shape when I met him, but I was crazy in love with him & everything else in the package compensated. Plump is the new normal. There is no try.”. Shut your eyes and think of Brad Pitt? I am so frustrated that I say things I probably shouldn’t. of scientific evidence to the effect that incremental middle-aged weight gain may actually be, health-wise, slightly protective. I shouldn’t be shocked. They are also in categories to help you find exactly the type of story you are in the mood for! Asking him to up the insurance – are you serious? It is interesting to me that I feel guilty about not being interested in sex, but he does not feel guilty for getting fat and staying fat. We promised each other (second marriage for each) that we would be fit and lean as we grow older. This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. If you let yourself go, you’re signaling that you just don’t care. And they can’t help but be influenced by the choices he makes for himself, even if he doesn’t necessarily allow them to order what he’s having. It never occurs to him that I am not very into sex because, hey, neither is he! Keeping the pounds off is one of the challenges of middle age. Trent laughed it off and agreed. I just wished he was as concerned for himself as the rest of us are. Beyond that, there are the vows we made to each other when we got married: “In sickness and in health.” But what if someone’s sickness (in a world full of true and tragic illnesses) is entirely self-imposed? Rachel Ray noticed that she began to lose weight when she was about 40 years old. I feel so embarrassed when we go out. He is still the same wonderful person I married, a fantastic husband and father, but it feels like I am with MY father! I really think what needs to happen is, I need to stop feeling guilty and ashamed I no longer want to have sex. Anonymous Mom Submissions – Terms & Conditions. He’s married now and probably gained another 30 after dumping me). I look great feel great and wish he would take an interest in exercise like I do. I look much younger than my age, am a very fit size 2 and enjoy being active. He confessed that he didn‘t feel so good about being portly himself. For years, Mark and I both stayed lean and fit. I don’t yell “Fatso!” when my beloved enters the room. I think he’s a hypocrite and I’m so tired of acting like it’s ok. Yet Ross, now her husband of three years, has repented for “slacking off.” “Weight gain is common during a spouse’s deployment, but I take full responsibility,” he says. Maybe your wife was slim and lithe when you married. I would like to say that I’m the kind of person who has waited supportively by while her partner takes the time he needs to reach the conclusion that something has to change. It is like he is oblivious to the fact that his weight gain is a turn off. It’s only fair that he, too, keep trim and fit. The problem is, when he’s not fasting he’s eating a high volume of fast foods. And I agree with the poster who feels angry because I love him but I’ve lost respect for him since he is highly critical of other people who are inconsistent. I’ve kept trim and fit. Annie Lane writes the Dear Annie advice column. Turn and face the strange changes a la David Bowie? Marriage is for life. I think in my case I am realizing I need to be ok with no sex or intimacy because it won’t change, or make plans to leave. Dennis: Often it can take a year to work that weight off, and with each child the weight comes off slower each time. He actually said his weight gain was one of the reasons he wanted to break up because I didn’t motivate him to live a healthy lifestyle. (“Dad, can I have some Coke too?” “No, son.” “Why not?” Crickets….). Sex is uncomfortable at best – his layers of fat just get in the way, he’s too heavy & wide, I hate the sound of his fat slapping against me & my eyes are tight shut as I try to remember how it/he used to be. Initiating the Conversation 1 Assess the need to discuss weight. The actress, 44, was seen with a female pal as she walked her rescue dog Winnie, who she shares with girlfriend Holland Taylor, 78, amid widespread discussion over her 'weight gain… If I do what’s reasonably within my own power to remain attractive, do I have the right to expect the same? He smoked, and was underweight. Interactive Stories are "choose your own ending" stories started by an Author and continued by any Writing.Com member that wishes to participate. I’m with Greta. "I gained weight, so what?” – you might think one day. My husband has gained weight through the years to. He was thin when we met 14 years ago. When questioned about his weight, he claims it is water weight. I catch people looking askance at us all the time, thinking I could be with him for only one reason. It’s a challenge that many of us don’t meet. Have I adjusted to this new reality in a mature, responsible way, relying on the wisdom I’ve accumulated over nearly six decades of life, resolving that my sweetie is such a wonderful guy that I can overlook a few extra pounds? My husband even dresses like his dad. I suggest you start the next conversation with “I love you, unconditionally.” And then go on with “How can I help you? Mark, of course, isn’t a crime-fighting superhero. I resigned from packing all his lunches. When we got married, he weighed in on the high side of healthy for his height — not exactly fighting fit, but not flabby either. Maybe it’s because we both work outside the home and, with the vast majority of the household management already in my hands, I resent the needless additional burden of worrying about his food issues. Sex is not happening with us. “I’ll lose the weight,“ he promised. I work evenings, and so I make dinners in advance to minimize the chance he’ll take the kids to a restaurant or pick up a pizza on the way home. He obviously gets very upset about this – but upset at me – like it’s my fault! That changed nothing. Maybe my impatience stems from growing up in a home where self-delusion about food and struggles with obesity were part of the psychological furniture. I feel so guilty and ashamed like I am that “frigid older woman” that men complain about. I would like to say that I’m equally accepting of my husband’s weight, but that wouldn’t be true. At the time it caused issues with attraction. He thinks walking and mowing the lawn should be all he needs to do. Success Stories How Going Plant-Based Helped Me Reverse Type 2 Diabetes and Drop More Than 100 Pounds Before going plant-based, my diet was always what I … Sorry, your blog cannot share posts by email. What am I supposed to do? Aug 29, 2019 6:00 AM. Depending on the target group the stories typically have quite easily detectable plots/story lines that can be divided into two main groups: The stories about fat people ( (SS)BBW/BHM fiction) and the weight gain stories (WG fiction). Now he is fat. Failure. Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window), Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window), Click to share on Pinterest (Opens in new window), Click to share on LinkedIn (Opens in new window), Click to share on Reddit (Opens in new window), Click to email this to a friend (Opens in new window), Click to share on Tumblr (Opens in new window), Meet The Most Gorgeous Gray-Haired Women We Know, 7 Anti-Aging Tricks that Every Woman over 50 Should Use. 2. Nikocado Avocado skinny used to post vegan videos back in the day, but he has since then put on some weight. The vast majority of overweight people beat themselves up far more than the rest of the world does (even if it doesn’t look like it). I refused, saying that they are the memories our kids will treasure in the future. That changed nothing. Then… nothing. And two years ago, just before turning 40, he was diagnosed with Type 2 diabetes. Don’t you think they know that as well?? I have gained about 10 and am constantly exercising and working to keep my weight down. I am unhappy to. ... "I've been married for 10 years. And you do realize that they KNOW YOU and what you are thinking, yes? I am not thin. Guess what ladies, this isn’t about you, it’s about them and maybe, just maybe they need a supporting hand instead reprimanding instructions. I didn’t do anything but my level of attraction shocked me. I’m on year 9 of my marriage and I’m very frustrated. I sympathize with the author and the other readers’ comments. Maybe they are just waiting for an opportunity to dare and try to start getting healthy. To Connie, I would imagine most women are like me and have tried the understanding route, until realizing it doesn’t make a difference and sometimes they actually use it against you, as if your lack of support for diet program #212 is the issue – must be they need more support? Male Weight Gain Stories 296 ''Dave'' A Classic WG Story Revisited by YouAreFatteningUpNow, literature. At … A. That tummy, it seems, is here to stay. But in terms of being turned on sexually, it just isn’t there. When my gym refurbished I bought one of their old spinning cycles for him & put it in front of his office tv (he watches CNN at least an hour early each morning). Jerry just has to adjust. He has cardiomyopathy, takes at least 6 meds a day, snores to wake the dead every night, has sleep apnea and I am at my wits end. “She didn’t speak to me for 3 days.”. He doesn’t feel guilty and ashamed he is fat, is having problems with his erections, and is eating cupcakes. He wanted me, and my weight didn’t matter to him. My husband is on his way to 300 lbs. The reading I have done indicates weight gain is often a culprit. I will have a conversation with him about it again the next time he insinuates I am not that interested in sex, but I expect it to go nowhere. He is disappointed in my lack of interest in sex and seems to not recognize at all that this disinterest has a lot to do with that belly that is hanging over the edge of his pants.
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